Noosa & Fraser Island

Noosa is a two-hour drive north of Brisbane, and after our elongated hike on Hamilton Island, it feels like a long day travelling!

That said, after a good night’s sleep, we wake up excited at the prospect of our first-ever surf lesson. Feels rude not to, given that we are on Queensland’s famed Sunshine Coast. Part of the attraction of this particular surfing tour is that it involves a 50km off-road journey along the beach to Double Island Point. A great way to experience the Great Sandy National Park, and there’s certainly plenty to see.  Whales, dolphins, and assorted birds of prey keep us amused as we journey along the surf.    

When we arrive, we find that there are two different groups. One group is very sensibly going sea kayaking. The rest of us are going surfing. Our group comprises Jenn and I, three early-twenty-somethings, and the most enthusiastic surf instructor you could wish for, Gabby.

After donning the obligatory ‘shorty’, Gabby spends about 90 seconds on the beach explaining the theory of surfing and watching as we do a dry run.

As much as I love her enthusiasm, I am no wiser as to how to heft my 13.5 stone, 6-foot frame, onto the board, than when she started the explanation.

It reminds me vividly of my first driving lesson with my Dad, when he basically told me to ‘engage first gear and drive’. Whilst I enjoy self-discovery, that felt like a step too far, and resulted in me leaving my dad in the middle of a roundabout. I stropped-off home on foot.

I have a strong sense of déjà vu. So it was with some trepidation that I walked towards a choppy South Pacific with my board under my arm.

The basic idea seemingly was to paddle oneself out and wait to be called. Jenn is up first. Gabby grabs Jenn’s board, waits and then manoeuvres it into a suitable-sized wave. Two basic instructions then follow as Jenn picks up speed, ‘paddle, paddle, paddle’, followed by ‘stand up’. Jenn makes a credible effort, before wiping out. Shouts of encouragement from our instructor who seems genuinely delighted.

I’m up next. Even I know that this is not going to go well. I have no idea what I’m doing.

Still, in for a penny. Gabby grabs my board and says encouraging things whilst we wait for a wave. Sooner than I would like, I’m on my way – ‘paddle, paddle, paddle.’ That bit I can do. The beach is coming closer and I’m picking up speed. I hear Gabby shout, ‘stand up!’

I’m not sure what I attempt to do as I hear that command, but the result is an epic fail!

I tank hard. A wave comes over my head and I decide to swallow half the ocean. I’ve lost my surfboard and have mixed feelings when I am reunited with it as it smashes into my ribs!

My eyes are stinging (I’m not crying honest), I’ve bruised my ribs, and I have water escaping from every available orifice. Gabby gives me a thumbs-up. I meekly reply in kind.

This is clearly a stupid sport.

Over the next 90 minutes, Jenn and I try multiple times to stand. We get close – but no cigar. I manage to stand for about a millisecond – but it’s clear that I will not be competing anytime soon.

Good fun. I think. I definitely feel every one of my 45 years.

I’m not sad when it’s time to get back on the bus and head home. Surfing in Australia – tick. Done. Or at least some hybrid of it.

A more sedate day follows where we potter about Noosa.

A good friend, and former colleague of mine, Lisa is also in town. An Australian, now living in the UK, Lisa and her son are here on holiday. We meet up for an early dinner with Lisa and her friend, Danielle. Lovely evening on the beach with the sun-setting behind us. Good food, great company, and a nice glass of wine. Who needs surfing?

Following day, we wake up feeling a little worse for wear. Lovely hike around Noosa National Park and some downtime on the beach. Just what the doctor ordered. Easy to see why this place is so popular. Just a few hours drive from Brisbane and gorgeous sea, beach, and restaurants. If you skip the surfing, it’s almost ideal! 😉

We have a one-night stopover in Hervey Bay, ahead of a self-drive, off-road trip to K’gari (also known as Fraser Island). Originally, we were going to be doing a two-day hike, but seemingly, we were the only people stupid enough to think that was a good idea. With insufficient numbers to run the tour, we opt to hire a 4×4/camper and drive across the island by ourselves.

Now, the Australians in this part of the world take the great outdoors very seriously. There are lots of very impressive-looking trucks with every type of caravan, trailer and tent you can imagine. Most of it looks very cool. Lots of dark colours and adventurous-sounding names like, Raptor. In my mind’s eye, we will soon be joining this elite group of committed explorers. I can imagine our set-up now…

It comes as something of a surprise when we are introduced to our vehicle for the next two days. Imagine, if you will, what Barbie and Percy Pig’s love child might look like. Now imagine it throwing up all over a Toyota!

Gone is any notion of us looking cool and outdoorsy. This is without doubt the most embarrassing car I have ever been handed the keys to.

To add insult to misery, our car has a name painted on it. Not Raptor. Not even Pink Panther. Our car is called Miss Piggy. I’ll never be able to watch the Muppets Christmas Carol in the same way again!

The car will also serve as our accommodation for the evening. More on that to follow.

I’ve often wondered what it would be like to be a celebrity and have everyone stare at you. Well, driving Miss Piggy gave me a good idea. It’s hard not to stare at a bright pink 4×4. The rugged ferrymen at the dock have seen it all before, but even so, they seem to pay extra special attention when helping us reverse onto the barge.       

We’ve already had a 90-minute briefing on how to use the diff lock, adjust the tire pressure for sand, and defend ourselves against the resident Dingos. There are a healthy number of them on Fraser Island. Wild dogs are aggressive at the best of times, but more so, when fed by tourists. As a consequence, Dingo safety is a big thing on Fraser. We are thus told to carry a Dingo stick at all times, lest any Dingos decide that the drivers of Miss Piggy might be easy pickings. Jenn takes her duties very seriously…

We have also decided to take the optional “maxi-tracks” (sled like devices that go under the wheels in the event of the car becoming bogged). The local tourist information centre is at pains to highlight what has befallen those who have come before us…

Sure enough, within 5 minutes of being on the island, the car hits soft sand and we lose power. We gradually grind to a halt and listen as the engine strains and the wheels dig in. I’m not joking when I say that there is a Dingo watching happily from the side-lines. Still, this is not our first rodeo, we’ve driven off-road before. With fingers crossed we stick the car into the lowest possible gear, adjust the diff lock, and watch gratefully as the car gradually pulls itself through the sand. The cars that had been following us have disappeared, so we assume they must be bogged, as there is nowhere to turn. Miss Piggy 1 – local cars 0.

It’s a fun day out driving up the beach. We quickly get the hang of the driving, so no repeat of our previous near miss. The shipwreck of the once proud S.S. Maheno is particularly interesting. It’s made all the more interesting by the small planes that take turns to land on the beach.

We see plenty of wildlife and I manage to capture a collection of whale parts in the late afternoon… should have enough for a whole whale soon!

Sunset is at 5.30pm. So, by 4.30pm we are pulling into our camp site for the evening. It has basic amenities – but no hot water. There are three other groups of campers – all of whom look very well established by the time we arrive.

Our luxury suite comprises a double bed and two sleeping bags – accessed through the backdoor of Miss Piggy (that is not a euphemism). Not much for us to sort out there.

Our kitchen is rather compact. We have a single gas-powered cooking stove. Looks simple enough. Insert gas, turn knob and cook.

Obviously, I break it within seconds…

I don’t know how…

The knob just came off in my hand. On the plus side, I manage to get the knob back on and the gas flowing. On the downside, there is no longer any spark of ignition. Bugger!

It’s getting darker now and I’m messing about with my iPhone torch trying to fix the stove. No joy. It would be simple enough to rectify – but obviously, we have no matches. Bugger!

I try to create sparks by running the blades of two sharp knives together. No joy. Although, in my defence, I’m confident that it would have worked had further attempts not been vetoed by Jenn.

Fortunately, a curious Aussie gent walks over to say hello. I think he was genuinely intrigued to see what kind of twits would be driving a car like Miss Piggy. A nice chat and an entreaty for matches follow. We’re in luck and within a few minutes we have a nice cup of tea and a half-decent bacon sandwich cooked-up.

Bedtime is interesting. Don’t let the pictures fool you… that is not a Victorian height ceiling! We somehow manage to get ourselves into our sleeping bags. There’s a fair bit of noise from the forest, but amazingly we sleep until 7am next day.

Next morning, we are packed and gone in minutes. Amazing how motivating the prospect of a coffee at a café can be.   

Having survived the evening we hike to Lake Wabby – which is pretty gorgeous. We then spend the rest of the day by Lake McKenzie. The water is incredibly clear despite a surprisingly deep drop-off. Pure rainwater collected over a long, long time.

A late afternoon ferry sees us return Miss Piggy in all her glory. We’ve managed to avoid knackering the transition, rolling her, or doing any of the other daft things that would have resulted in us losing our $2000 bond. A decent result.

It’s not the most luxurious night we will ever spend – but a fun experience nonetheless. Great island and a nice way to see it (pink vehicle notwithstanding).

A welcome pizza and stop over back in Hervey Bay and then next day it’s off to Brisbane.